Warning: This story mentions suicide and may be upsetting to some readers. A list of resources for people who need support is provided at the end of the story.
In a B.C. cemetery Candice Papequash places tiny Christmas decorations on the ground next to her nephew's grave, saying it's a gesture meant to show he is still with his family "in spirit".
Her nephew was Cree teen Traevon Desjarlais who died in an Abbotsford group home in September of 2020. Last week, a coroner’s jury made 18 recommendations following an inquest into his death.
But Papequash wonders if anything will change in time to prevent future tragedies.
“I hope that some of these recommendations are implemented right away so we don’t have to lose any more of our kids,” Papequash said.
A LAUGH THAT FILLED THE WHOLE HOUSE
Traevon lived with Papequash and her family for about a year-and-a-half beginning in 2017.
She describes her nephew as kind and gentle.
“He seemed to get along with everybody,” Papequash said.
“His laugh, definitely it would fill the whole house,” said Traevon’s cousin, Alicia Desjarlais. “He liked to bring joy to other people and it made him happy.”
But she said Traevon was troubled and struggled to make connections with others.
Traevon lived with Papequash and her family in 2017 but moved out after about a year and a half.
“He was a teenager, he wants to come home and game and not follow the rules of the house,” Papequash said about Traevon’s reason for leaving.
However, she said he would have been welcome back anytime. She says she wishes someone would have asked her if she would take him in before he died and she still worries she should have done more.
BODY NOT DISCOVERED FOR DAYS
Traevon was just 17 when he took his own life at the group home. It wasn’t until four days after he was noticed missing that his body was found in his bedroom.
The inquest heard that a worker noticed a smell in the house, but thought it was a dead pet.
“He was in the same house. He was in the closet. The closet door was broken and he was leaning up against it. You thought that the smell was a hamster?” said Alicia, who cried as she spoke of what had happened.
“There was three of them and you didn’t see when you went and checked under his bed?” she questioned.
His aunt, also became emotional when speaking about what happened to Traevon.
“Would it be different if it was a white kid there? If it was a white child hanging in that room would it be different?”
NEED FOR CULTURAL CONNECTION, AWARENESS
One of the coroner’s recommendations was that cultural connections be fostered for children in care.
The jury noted that Traevon’s workers had little to no cultural awareness.
“I think one of the big things for me is educating the foster parents on Indigenous culture and colonization,” said Alicia.
“I think that’s something they should have known beforehand. If you’re working with indigenous youth, you should know about our history,” she said.
The inquest also heard that 70 per cent of kids in care in B.C. are Indigenous.
Traevon’s aunt supports the jury’s calls for a new IT system to connect caregivers with crucial information. It’s something she believes was missed with Traevon.
“That should have been implemented already... just so everybody has a good grasp on what is happening with every child,” she said.
RECOMMENDATIONS NOT BINDING
But the jury’s recommendations can’t be enforced. And that worries Traevon’s family.
“That’s very alarming because this is an ongoing thing. It’s going to keep happening,” Alicia said.
“How long is it going to take to make sure all these policies are in place?” asked Papequash who said the family hopes that Traevons’ voice will be heard and that the tragic end to his life will bring positive change.
She believes the tipping point for her nephew was when he found out his uncle was dying.
He is now buried next to that uncle.
“The only thing that gives me comfort out of Traevon’s tragedy is that I know he’s with his uncle and that they’re together,” she said.
If you or someone you know is in crisis, here are some resources that are available.
Canada Suicide Prevention Helpline (1-833-456-4566)
Centre for Addiction and Mental Health (1 800 463-2338)
Crisis Services Canada (1-833-456-4566 or text 45645)
Kids Help Phone (1-800-668-6868)
If you need immediate assistance call 911 or go to the nearest hospital.
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